Some minds bloom sideways.
Some don’t sit still in the chair of expectation.
Some speak in colour, metaphor and movement instead of neat little categories.
And yet, we label them.
We say neurodiverse, as if that wraps it all up nicely.
As if it explains the ache of being different, the fatigue of trying to fit, or the beauty of not.
But neurodiverse compared to what? The imagined ‘standard’ or compared to the truth of a designed mind, built perfectly for its own kind of wonder and life experience?
Who built the centre from which we measure all else?
Let’s Talk About “Normal”
That word ‘normal’ has such a quiet weight, doesn’t it?
It slips into conversations unnoticed.
Are they normal? Is that behaviour normal?
But underneath it all is this strange assumption: that there’s a standard setting for being human.
And if you fall outside of it; your mind too fast, your energy too loud, your silence too deep, you get a new label. Something to explain you. To manage expectations. To put you back in the system, somehow.
But normal isn’t neutral.
It’s made up.
It’s often biased.
And I’ll be honest, it’s never truly fit anyone I’ve met.
The Numbers Are Changing. Or Maybe We Are.
Diagnoses of ADHD are rising fast, especially in women and girls who’ve spent years masking to survive.
Autism, too, is being recognised more widely and more wisely. It’s not that more people are broken, it’s that we’re finally looking properly. So when does “neurodiverse” stop meaning other and start meaning part of the landscape?
At what point do we stop talking about difference as if it’s the exception and start acknowledging that the so-called “norm” might actually be the outlier?
The Power of a Word
We use terms like “ethnic minority” or “neurodiverse” as if they’re neutral. But words are never just words.
They carry centuries of meaning.
Power. Place. Position.
And often, they centre one group as the standard….everyone else as a deviation.
But who crowned neurotypical as the default?
Who decided the classroom, the office, the conversation, should all follow one script?
I’ve worked with countless clients who thought they were failing. But it wasn’t them. It was the structure.
The noise. The speed. The pressure to perform. The misunderstanding. The side-lining.
Most of us don’t want a label. We want a life that doesn’t require one.
The Forest Doesn’t Pick a Favourite
Picture this:
A woodland brimming with trees.
Pine. Birch. Hazel. Beech.
One isn’t more right than another. They just are.
Rooting. Growing. Reaching.
You’d never look at a willow and say,
“That one’s the odd one out.”
You’d marvel. You’d notice. You’d sit under it for shade. You may notice its beautiful leaves.
Same with humans.
We each reach for light in our own way.
And difference isn’t a problem….it’s our pattern.
It’s a designed mind, growing as it was always meant to.
Are We Still Using Old Maps?
Terms like ADHD, Autism, OCD; they can help.
They can offer language, relief, recognition.
But they’re not the full story.
Sometimes they’re just the signposts we need to find each other.
And sometimes, they risk becoming cages instead of keys.
Because honestly? The human mind is vast and varied.
Many of us carry flickers; moments of hyperfocus, forgetfulness, deep sensitivity, creative or frustrated bursts that arrive unannounced. But for some, these traits aren’t passing quirks. They shape every hour, every relationship, every breath. They’re not just tendencies, they’re bumpy terrains to navigate constantly.
This isn’t to say we all understand neurodivergence because we’ve felt distracted or dreamy. It’s to acknowledge the spectrum we live on and to honour those whose experience of it is lifelong, systemic, and often unseen.
Maybe the question isn’t, Are you neurodiverse?
But rather, Have you had to reshape yourself to survive?
A World Built for All of Us
What would it mean to stop asking people to adapt, and start asking systems to soften?
Imagine schools with movement breaks and silence rooms.
Workplaces with choice and trust.
Relationships where we honour needs, not punish them.
Because the goal was never to fix people.
The goal is to create space for people to be fully themselves.
To stop trimming the vine to fit the pot.
Are we now queuing up to be tested, because we need help to fit in, or to have adjustments made for us through an officially diagnosed request only?
What If There’s No Such Thing As Neurotypical?
